So I was cleaning out some old papers and found this. I wrote it a few years ago and thought how much my life has and hasen't changed since I worte this. Things have gotten a LOT better, but not everything. :/
I used to write stuff like this all the time, but most has gotten thrown out.
Anyways, I thought I would share this with you guys.
You, my readers, are the ones that have heard my song by reading my fanfictions. You may or maynot know it, but I put ALL of my emotions into my stories when I write them, so by reading and understanding all my built up emotions, you have heard my song and have set me free.
I no longer have an overload of those sad and hurt emotions anymore. So I thought this would be nice to share with you guys.
A lot of the things in my story are true (if not all of the things I wrote) I DO cry in my sleep still. I don't know why but I do. I'll wake up and catch myself crying. It's really weard. @.@
I also WAS born with holes in my heart have have yet to fall in love or even get a big crush on anyone. (fictional characters do NOT count. ^_^; ) Also, side note, I was born with 5 different heart deffects, holes in my heart being one of them.
My dad is a HUGE hot head and still is. He'll go off about LITTERALLY ANYTHING!! (it's CRAZY!)
I'm VERY close to my mom, and thank god for that because she's my one release, but there was a time when I felt I couldn't talk to her.
My brother is rarely home. We don't NOT get along, but we're not all buddy buddy like we used to and it makes me sad.
I am very good at hidding or covering up my emotions in front of others, often times putting on a smile when I'm feeling depressed. I will RARELY let others see me really mad, sad, hurt, ect. (Which is why it surprises them when I DO get mad and go off on someone)
I also was always considered the 'freak' but that was part of my childhood long bullying I went through. (Seriously, I was bullied BADLY from first grade up until my freshmen year of high school. From threats, to being beaten up, to name calling and emotional abuse. Wose thing was, I would tell teachers and principles and even my mom would call and complain but the teachers and principles NEVER did ANYTHING. It kinda sucked.)
My greatest fear IS to be forgotten. (Weird I know)